Enjoying time with family and friends...and missing Ben

I've been here at my parents' house since last Saturday night after spending a week with Ben and his family at his parents' house in Adrian.  He left VERY early on Sunday morning, and I thought it would be nice to give him a full uninterrupted night's sleep the day before he traveled.
I cried all the way up to my mom's house though.

It's been 4 years since we've been separated, and I already miss him.  As soon as he landed in FL, he called and told me, "Get Delilah and just fly down here to be with me."  He misses us too.

Got some news earlier this week...Ben will be gone for a year in February!  I'm sad/nervous/excited.  I'm sad because he'll be away so long and miss a lot of new stuff Delilah does.  I'm nervous because I will be here (at my parents' house thankfully), but without him to help, and I'm excited because this is the beginning of the end of us living in New Mexico (hopefully).  He'll get a month to come home in the middle (or maybe at Christmas time), and we could possibly go visit him.  It will certainly be a change.  We've been lucky to not have him be deployed before this.


I had a dream about the insane aunt of mine that I wrote about on a previous post.  In my dream, I saw her at Walmart, and she confronted me.  (Which I know would never happen because she is cowardly and wouldn't have the nerve to confront anyone ever)  I told her that SHE KNEW what the truth was, and knew that her daughter had been lying all along, but I also knew that if she took my mom's side, my cousin would keep her daughter away from my aunt.  So I knew she had to turn her back on the people that helped her through the most difficult time in her life.  She nodded and looked as ashamed as I could possibly imagine someone COULD look ashamed.  I know that's how it is.  Doesn't make it right or OK, but I know the truth.  So does my mom.  So does she.

Other stuff:

*Delilah tried to say her name yesterday!  She said "Didah"!

*Planning on going to the zoo with my mom on Monday!

*Craft day with some of my lady friends soon!

And some pictures:

Found these at an antique mall for $1 a piece!  

Got her feet in grass for the first time!

Good morning instagram sent to Ben.

At the Memorial Day pig roast!

I'm HOOOOME

Finally, the countdown is over.  We made it back to MO last Saturday night, just in time for Bethany's graduation.  It was super hot in the gym, I had to fan Delilah the entire time...blech.  She did well though and slept on Pop Pop most of the time.  Bethany sang in a quartet and sounded beautiful!  After the graduation, we came back to Ben's parents' house for a party.  I forgot to take pictures, but I have some that Aunt Nancy took!

We've only been in town a couple days, so we haven't done TOO much, but we did go up and see some friends up north the other day.  We're heading up to visit my mom today, and then off to OK Joe's for lunch.  (YUUUUUM)

Tonight+Tomorrow

Tonight:
I'm having a Pampered Chef party at my house.  Just something to do, I suppose.  Have to do what you can when there isn't much to do out here in Clovis!  Having some ladies come over and just hang out for awhile.  Ben is going over to a friend's house, but Delilah will be staying with me.  Maybe he'll take her with him, that way, I can host my party.  Who knows.

Tomorrow:
My first Mother's Day!

In the past week:

*I have had more doctor's appts for Delilah and I than I'd like.
*I'm feeling MUCH better.
*I've been cleaning out the house.
*My laptop stopped working.
*Delilah went from not being able to sit up independently to only wanting to sit that way.
*Had Ben's birthday party.

The sweet HAND CARVED pipe I got him FROM THE UKRAINE!

Singing to the birthday boy!

I hope he made a sweet wish!

*Walked as much as possible.
*Continued to make my reminder lists for Missouri.
*Gotten annoyed by people on facebook attacking one another.
*Organized the massive amounts of breast milk in my freezer.
*Taken pictures of Delilah.

*Spent too much time on my phone.
*Crafted

Made these to hang in Delilah's room.

This and the following are an order I got from a girl here in Clovis.  

*Played with my dogs.
*Hung out with Ben.

I wish I had time to write a post that wasn't just a list with some pictures, but so it goes.

xoxo

Shots+organizing

I've been in cleaning/organizing mode at my house lately.  I'm taking ideas from pinterest and trying to turn them into my own to get my house in order.  There's too much clutter that we've let accumulate.  The garage is especially bad.  We've just basically junked it up.  There's stuff in there that should have been trashed long ago.  I feel good getting to it now though.
We're making a big haul to the recycling center this Saturday if Ben can get someone with a pick up to help us. We have:
mini fridge
broken metal chair
2 vacuums
grill
lawnmower

I just got rid of the carpets in there last night.  Garbage pick up is on Thursday, and we'll be junking a lot more. I'd like to be able to clean it out and be able to use it.

Delilah had her 4 month shots today.  (Late-not my fault!)  She weighs 19lbs 11oz.  26 inches long.  My big healthy baby!  Ben had to work, so I had to take her to get her shots.  I put on my brave face, prayed the night before for a sense of calm for her, and bucked up and got it done.  She got 4 shots this time and cried.  As soon as I picked her up, she stopped.  I'm so thankful for my champ of a baby!  I know her legs are sore today, so we've been taking it easy.  Just took a walk, and she's sleeping in her stroller.  Sweet baby.

Only 20 days until we go back to Missouri!  I'm ready for this trip!

Some stuff in the news has been bugging me.

Veteran and Wife Murdered

If you watch the video (and please do), the guy hits the nail on the head.  This incident happened at the same time as the Trayvon incident.  Unfortunately, the murder of the war veteran and the brutal gang rape and murder of his wife went unnoticed by the national news media because they were busy reporting on the shooting of Trayvon Martin.  That was a tragedy, yes...but so is this, and no one seems to know about it.  It can't be turned into a Liberal vs Conservative or a black vs white issue.  So it's ignored.  It's not right.  This man served his country and lived his life, and the tragic way it was ended is ignored.  That's AWFUL.

Anti-Bullying Speaker Dan Savage Bullies Christians

My issue with him isn't about the way he talks about the Bible (because there will always be ignorant people out there bashing the Bible), but it seems QUITE hypocritical that someone who is supposedly so into anti-bullying would bully others.  He called those who were offended and left "pansy asses".  Those people who didn't agree with him...so basically, the exact same thing he was fighting against.  The people he was bullying weren't gay though, so maybe they didn't matter to him.  

I'm so sick of this anti-bullying nonsense.  It isn't a new thing.  It's been going on since I was in grade school, since my mom was, since my grandma was.  It happens everywhere and to almost everyone whether you're: white, black, Christian, Muslim, young, old, gay, straight, short, pale, tan, tall, fat, skinny, etc...You get the picture.  Mean people have always been around and will always be around.  They will pick on those that aren't like them and that's just the way it is.  You can't get them to stop, because they don't care.  Honestly, most of them had bullies as parents.  Bullying is a learned behavior.  Empathy is too.  Instead of trying (unsuccessfully) to get  these people to stop being mean, how about we try and empower our kids and give them ways to deal with it?  It's not like bullying ends in school.  I know SEVERAL bullies in the military wife circles I run in.  Yeah, they bug me A LOT, but I have to deal with them.  That's life.  You can't always have someone holding your hand when people are mean to you.  Sometimes you have to just buck up and deal with it.  And yeah, it sucks.  I've had awful rumors started about me.  No reason at all for this happening except the people that I know are mean/bored/jealous/unhappy.  That's life.  I had to just deal with them.  Who do I have to run and tell?  No one.  I have to take care of it myself.  I called them out on the untruths, and then I stopped being friends with them.  I took myself out of situations where I would have to see them. Yes, there are times when I still do, unfortunately, but I'm polite and that's about it.  Yeah, they still talk about me, but I really don't give a crap.

See, in life, you're going to encounter a lot of people you don't like (especially if you're a military spouse!), and you gotta figure out how to maneuver through the shit.  There are a lot of really awesome people too, and that's who I choose to surround myself with.  

High school is 4 years....almost NOTHING in comparison with your life.  I recently looked up some people I graduated with, and most of them are still living in the town we graduated in, working at gas stations, delivering pizza, working at Walmart.  These are the people who were mean in school.  Trust me, it happens!  Their glory days are in high school.  Same thing with the people that Ben graduated with!  

Gotta get through some shit to really enjoy the good stuff that comes in life. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm going to get SEVERELY pissed when/if Delilah gets bullied.  But if it doesn't stop with some intervention, I'm going to teach Delilah how to be strong and stand up for herself.  I had to. Ben had to. People everywhere have to. 

That's all for now.  

And now for a cute picture:

Draft day girls!  We're the cutest.

Well, after giving it some thought, I've decided to not send my biological father that letter.  I thought long and hard, and I just decided that he wasn't worth send a letter to.  If ever I have the chance to see him in person, I'd tell him those things.  I highly doubt he'd even read it through.

Anyway.

Trying out a new church tomorrow.  Hopefully it'll be more traditional than the one we've gone to the past 2 Sundays.  I miss church and having a church family.  I had such fun at Open Door.  I was involved in Awana and had friends and felt very welcome.

I've been watching Sister Wives and Big Love recently.  This is SO weird.  I don't understand the concept of the multiple marriages...and I don't know where they get the "Biblical" idea that it's right.  So bizarre.

Visiting Daddy in the Tower for the first time!

There is something wrong with you if your heart doesn't melt from looking at this picture.

Also, I have teal nails.  I've been bouncing back and forth between teal and coral.  Wish I had time to do some designs!