I wish there was a way for me to accurately explain things all the time instead of words getting caught up in my head and mouth.  Alas, I'm unable to say things right sometimes.

I'd also like to be able to see how things will turn out even 4 weeks from now...but I guess everyone would want that.  Duh.

This weekend was pretty fun.  Went to trivia on Thursday and a movie on Friday night.  New Thor was WAY better than the first one.  WAY better.  Everyone seemed to like to pretty well.  Went out on Saturday and got some fabric and crafty stuff.  I've got to find some stuff to occupy my mind.  Making Delilah a dress soon.  I don't have the energy to right now.  Spent Saturday night at home and Sunday at church+running errands.  

Nothing really exciting to report.  Hopefully I'll be able to get out and about this weekend too.  I'm trying really hard to keep myself occupied and do things for myself.

Just for fun, I'm bored.

• 1. Did you wake up cranky?
• No, Delilah wakes me up with cuddles, so I'm usually pretty happy.
• 2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?
• EEk. No. 
• 3. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?
• I prefer boys, but I've got a really awesome core group of girlfriends now.
• 4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?
• I do daily.
• 5. Can you commit to one person?
• Absolutely. Duh.
• 6. How do you look right now?
• A hot mess.
• 7. What exactly are you wearing right now?
• PJs, no makeup.
• 8. How often do you listen to music?
• Daily.
• 9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?
• Jeans.
• 10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2014?
• I hope not.
• 11. Are you a social or an antisocial person?
• Social.
• 12. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?
• We'd have a lot of things to say, since we're married, haha.
• 13. Are you good at hiding your feelings?
• Sometimes.
• 14. Can you drive a stick shift?
• Learned to drive on one...but that's been 12 years ago.
• 15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?
• Depends on who is doing the talking. I've got some family members who are legitimately crazy who talk about me a lot (and stalk this blog) and I had some acquaintances in NM who would.  Those don't bother me. They don't matter. If someone I cared about was, then I would care.
• 16. Are you going out of town soon?
• Nope.
• 17. When was the last time you cried?
• Yesterday.
• 18. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?
• Sure.
• 19. If you could change your eye color, would you?
• Nope. I love my eyes.
• 20. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
• Trivia!
• 21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.
• Well, the day is over, so I'm OK.
• 22. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?
• When I was much much younger.
• 23. Are you nice to everyone?
• I try to be. I tease a lot, but I've been working on that.
• 24. What are you sitting on right now?
• My bed.
• 25. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?
• Obviously.
• 26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?
• Sure, haven't we all?
• 27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?
• Ben.
• 28. Do you get a lot of colds?
• Not as of late.
• 29. Have your pants ever fallen down in public?
• Nope.
• 30. Does anyone hate you?
• I'm not sure.
• 31. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
• I don't tell anyone everything.  There are some things I keep to myself.
• 32. Do you like watching scary movies?
• Yes.
• 33. Are you a jealous person?
• Yes.
• 34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?
• I wouldn't delete any. Even if they sucked, they all had high points and had a purpose for learning and growing.
• 35. Did you have a dream last night?
• Yep.  I don't remember much last night. I remember I texted my friend Jonny. I remember being caught in a room full of monsters or something with Ben. I don't remember much else.
• 36. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to?
• God.
• 37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
• Yes.
• 38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?
• Yes.
• 39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
• I hope so.
• 40. Did you have a good day yesterday?
• It wasn't terrible.
• 41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?
• Yes.
• 42. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?
• No.
• 43. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?
• Holding hands and watching American Horror Story.
• 44. What’s the best part about school?
• That I'm done with it for awhile.
• 45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?
• Yes.
• 46. What are you afraid of?
• Drowning, being alone.
• 47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?
• All the time.
• 48. Were you single over the last summer?
• No.
• 49. What are you supposed to be doing right now?
• Probably sleeping.
• 50. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?
• Yes.

Down week.

I've been pretty down this week. 

Lots of stuff going through my head, and not a real way of getting it out to make sense.

So after a couple of really bad days, I decided that if I can't fix the problems or whatever myself, I COULD do things to actively make myself feel better. 

Step one was easy.  My kid is awesome and makes me smile every single day.

Ok, come ON.  Our church directory picture.

Check.

Step two was to do something to make myself feel purdy.

Umm, why haven't I been getting funky colors?  I'm not a white tips kinda girl.  Time I get back to myself.

Check.

Step three was to get outside.

A walk in the woods with my lovey and my dogs was good for the spirit.

Check.

Step four was to have one of my best friends over for talking&wine.

We ran out of wine.

Check.

I appreciate the people in my life.

I miss the people I don't talk to or see much of.

I have to make a conscious effort to be happy sometimes, and I know that everyone has to do that now and again.

I have to remember that things could ALWAYS be worse.  In the moment, things always seem worse than they are.  Gotta pray.

In case you needed to see what a tender hearted baby looks like, here's Delilah when she's unable to play with her Grandpa and give him hugs because he's sick.  She told me that she's really sad because he was sick.

He didn't have supper with us for 3 days because he didn't want to get everyone else sick, and she was so darn concerned about him she just couldn't contain her sadness.  I just freaking love her tender caring heart.  She is so much like me.  

Step 5 is a shopping day out with my mom and Delilah.  I'm looking for a new sectional or living room set, and we're gonna go out to eat as well.  

Rainy Days

It's been gloomy here this week.  I usually like gloomy gray days, but I've had such a heavy heart for days now.  

I've been doing some Christmas shopping and started planning Delilah's 2nd birthday.  Not ready to announce the theme yet.  I still have some weird lurkers who come to read my blog.  

First time trick r treating!

She was ready to get candy...which she didn't care about once we got home.

First stop!

I was Princess Peach!

On my way out with friends!

Chip was...something.

I met a Bowser who had a costume made out of balloons!

Danny and Sandy were there too, looking super keen.

Yippee!

The most fun!

Reading me a book

Our church directory picture.  The cuteness is almost overwhelming!

My friend's new baby.  Delilah was pretty thrilled.

Anyway, I guess that's all of an update I'm up to give tonight.  It's late, I'm tired.  I've been up browsing the internet while Delilah coughs in her sleep.  Having a sick toddler is not fun.  Looking forward to when this crud is over.